Last week, I went to my family doctor and asked for a referral to see a psychiatrist. I told him what I’ll tell you: the further away from Erica I get, the more I see that she was toxic, abusive, … Continued
A few nights ago, before I went to Vancouver for the day, I’d watched a music video that was advertised in my Instagram feed. It was a new track from Lewis Capaldi – a singer who’s music has hit close … Continued
Hoo boy. Yesterday is a lot to unpack. Night before last, I had the same problem I always have – fall asleep, and wake up a few minutes later, fully “activated” (thanks, Erica, I’ll never get THAT fucking word out … Continued
I’ve said several times in my posts, and in the real world that I wholeheartedly believe that I have been in an abusive relationship and repeatedly used and manipulated by a covert narcissist. I’ve told my therapist, I’ve told my … Continued
As I continue to pour through our old texts and conversations, I am experiencing both rage and a profound sadness. I have these moments where I fluctuate between missing her so completely that I feel utter despair at knowing I … Continued
Over the past couple days, I have had some long, deep conversations with my wife about the past 3 years, 8 months and 8 days since I met Erica. Shawna and I have had long conversations about how much and … Continued
Someone asked me today what I would say to her if I had two minutes to stand in front of her on a deserted sandbar in the middle of the ocean, where neither of us could escape. If we HAD … Continued
Erica Van Driel and I met on PoF – she messaged me – and her username was “PopcornForDinner”. She had no profile photo and no information, so I was leery of her, and was very cautious. We chatted a bit, … Continued
Figuring out how to edit and post video and audio. Thought I’d start with this. (The links below are audio files) I am being painted as a villain because I am constantly searching for the truth. I’m perpetually trying to … Continued
I went to see my therapist today. I almost didn’t go. As someone who has seen just how dysfunctional, abusive and fundamentally broken a professional advice giver who has made it their life’s work to tell other people how to … Continued